Sealed Before the Seal

With fall settling in and the leaves starting to let go, I’m reminded of those early days when Jesus began to draw me close. Every year when the trees start turning, I think of how He wooed me — even through something as ordinary as the changing of seasons.

When sharing my salvation story, I often say Jesus started dating me at 30.

Boy, does that draw some looks.

But it’s true. For three years, He wooed me — quietly, relentlessly, but so gently that I barely knew what was happening until my whole heart belonged to Him. I wasn’t the “walk the aisle, shake the preacher’s hand, fill out the 3×5 card” kind of convert. It was more of what people describe as being “slayed in the street.”

He met me right in my living room, at an ottoman, a bowl of soup cooling beside me. When the weight of what I’d done in my life and who I’d been finally broke over me, I wept — the kind of weeping that leaves you emptied and limp. It started as His wooing did — subtle, gentle. But then grace hit me like a collapse, and I was drowning in that grace and His love before I realized what it all meant.

Looking back, I can see He’d been sealing me long before I, or anyone else, could see it — love letters written on my heart in invisible ink. Every small tug toward Him, every unexpected moment of peace, every conversation that stirred something raw and unrestrained… all of it was preparation for the day He’d make it public.

Some of the sweet, small parts still stand out — maybe they were meant only for me, but I can’t help sharing the simple ways Jesus shows up. Once, driving down Main Street in the fall, I slowed for the red light in front of my church. Orange and brown leaves from the big tree out front began raining down on my windshield. I don’t know why, but I saw kisses — kisses from heaven, falling soft against the glass. To this day, whenever a leaf lands on my windshield, I smile. It still feels like He’s whispering, Remember when I found you? Remember when I wanted you to know I was right there with you, even in the mundane moments of life, like driving to work?

Kisses from heaven~

I know some folks would just see leaves falling on a windshield, but I saw love as a message in motion.

At 33 — approximately the same age Jesus was when He left this earth — I walked into the water. My baptism became my wedding ceremony. My friend Janine, who had been praying for me all along and really played a large part in leading me to Jesus, decorated our small chapel with linens and candles. All the lights were off. When I walked in that evening, chills came on top of chills. I could smell the sweet scent of white roses and see candlelight flickering across the pool of water. My robe felt like a wedding dress. I had already fallen in love and declared myself His, but that night I showed everyone who I clearly belonged to for life. There is no more sacred vow to give. It remains one of the most beautiful moments of my life, second only to salvation itself and birthing my two boys.

Years later, I heard Misty Edwards’ song “You Won’t Relent.” When she sang, “Set me as a seal upon your heart,” something in me stilled. I realized that’s what had happened back then — before the water, before the robe, before the witnesses. My baptism was the outward vow to match the covenant He had already written inside me. He had already sealed me before the water touched my skin — already claimed me before I claimed Him.

He was relentless, yet gentle. Patient, yet unstoppable. And every time a leaf falls on my windshield, I remember: He kissed me long before He crowned me. He sealed me before the seal.

“You won’t relent until You have it all,

My heart is Yours.”

— Misty Edwards, “You Won’t Relent”